Coaching is forward-facing. Therapy asks how you got here; coaching asks what you want and what is in the way. Some people need one, some the other, and some need therapy first.
Couples therapy is health care. It is the right place for recurring conflict that keeps escalating, the aftermath of an affair, depression or anxiety affecting the relationship, or a history that keeps replaying in the present. It is provided by a licensed therapist and can sometimes be reimbursed by insurance.
Coaching is for people who are functioning and want to move deliberately: clarifying what you want, making a plan, and getting accountable support while you carry it out. It is self-pay and not billed to insurance. If you are not sure which you need, say so at the consult — we will tell you honestly, including when the answer is therapy.
A vital aspect of our lives involves our relationships, our connections, and intimacy with one another. Our coaches provide clarity and insight while implementing strategies to uncover your specific relationship wants, needs and goals — and a plan to meet them and sustain them, whatever the relationship type.
Dr. Bukky Kolawole is a licensed psychologist (NY, NJ), a PSYPACT participant and a MINT-member Motivational Interviewing trainer. She currently takes relationship coaching clients only, not therapy clients.
Motivational Interviewing shapes how she coaches: it is built around your own reasons for change rather than advice from the outside, which is why it holds up after coaching ends. The same relationship skills sit at the center of her executive coaching work with leaders.
Founder · Psychologist · Executive Coach · Relationship Coach
Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) for couples · Race-based stress and racial trauma · LGBTQ+ topics · Intensive work · Motivational Interviewing (MINT member) · Relationship and executive coaching
Accepting new clients
Couples & Individual Therapist
Couples · LGBTQ+ · Non-monogamy · Relational dynamics · Gottman Method
Accepting new clients
Therapy treats what is causing distress, often including the past; coaching works forward from where you are toward what you want. Coaching is not a substitute for therapy when there is a clinical problem, and we will say so if we think you need therapy.
No. Coaching is not a health service and is not billable to insurance. It is self-pay.
Yes, by video — for individuals and couples in New York, New Jersey and beyond.
Say what is going on at the consult and we will tell you honestly, including when the answer is therapy with someone else.
Package rates are being finalized — ask at the consult and we will send the current schedule.
Tell us what is going on. We will tell you honestly whether we are the right practice for it, and match you with the practitioner who fits — or point you to someone better placed.
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